Saturday, November 29, 2008
I am so glad that the Christmas season is here. I love the music, the decorations and I am of course patiently awaiting the showing of "A Charlie Brown Christmas" on TV. Life is more cozy. Last night I laid on the couch in front of the fire reading a book with Christmas music playing in the background...it was so cozy. But, it also means a season for spending time with family and friends. It makes me miss home...A LOT. I miss the snow(sitting in the house watching it fall...not driving in it), I miss laughing with my family and seeing the ornaments I made so long ago hanging on the tree. I miss handing out the presents to everyone on Christmas eve just like I have done each year before. We have wonderful friends here in California to celebrate the holidays with and I cannot wait for my parents to fly out to visit us on Christmas day. I am looking forward to picking out a tree with Chris, decorating our house and enjoying the holiday season. I picked up our Christmas cards today...they are hilarious...Chris and I decided that we did not want a picture of us this year, but we also did not want to write in a million cards, so instead we took a picture of our dog, Zena (newly adopted into our family in August), wearing a Santa hat and sitting front of the fire...we look like crazy dog people and I do believe that they could have devoted a section on us in the movie "Best in Show". The greatest part is not really being crazy dog people...our friends and family are going to be thinking that we moved to California and became nuts...I love it! I am working hard to make Chrismas feel truly like Christmas...I think that means I am going to have to learn to bake like my mom...
Friday, November 28, 2008
The last couple of months I have not been interested in making me a better me. I have been just going through the motions. I am good person...a person with a lot of drive and someone who definitely could make a difference in the world. But I have chosen to sit back and watch the world go by. Why, you may ask? I don't know. I wish I did...it would be a lot easier. I think it all started when a great friend of mine passed away in June. It was a huge wake up call that we are only guarenteed THIS MOMENT in life. You would think this would have motivated me to live up every minute, embrace everyone around me and try to change to world. Instead, I did the opposite. I became weak...not caring. Since then, I've watched the days pass by...going through the motions with little heart. NOT ANYMORE. I am over it. As many of you know, I struggle daily with anxiety...I worry about everything...for no reason. But, I do. I go to acupuncture and take my herbs(legal ones) and am getting back on track. I am making an effort to be a better me. Not to make this Bridget Jones' diary or anything...but I am going to make a strong effort to eat healthier, exercise more and live a healthier life. I am turning 30 in May and my goal is to be on the road to a healthy lifestyle by then. I owe it to me...and the others around me who inspire me daily. Here's to my New Year's Resolution in November!
Thursday, November 27, 2008
So here I am...blogging once again. I tried this once...it lasted one blog. I plan on this one lasting much longer...but check with me on Saturday. I have been so inspired to blog ever since starting to read my friend Sandi's blog, but something she said the other day made me really think about it. She said that the blog is for her...to get all of her thoughts out...not for anyone else. I think that is why my last blog did not work. It took me so long to decide what to write about and what people wanted to hear instead of writing what I wanted to say. I was so worried about what the people reading my blog would think about me after reading it...so it became realistic fiction instead of the real thing. I admire Sandi's honesty in her blog...I am going to try my best to do the same. I want this to be a recording of the journey of my life. I thought about starting a journal, but the thoughts in my head go a lot faster than my hand can write...so I have turned to typing. Today is Thanksgiving. There are many things to be thankful for...family, friends, health, all the basics. I have learned to look on the bright side...Chris had to work today, but I am thankful he has a job that provides for our family, I know that there are many people who wish they had the same. I am sad to be away from our family in Minnesota, but I am so thankful that there is other family there giving mom and dad hugs and filling in for us. It rained today, I am so thankful that God made the rain because it reminds us that although all of our days are not sunny and bright, that He is always there. My mind is racing...I want to write years of thoughts down...but I know that doing so in this one blog will be overwhelming. Instead, I will say good night and blog again soon!